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Thank you for writing to us and sharing your personal feelings with us. We hope it has
helped you by writing about things going on in your head. We hope it also helps others
too who read this and can relate to your situation.
Secretly Falling Apart
Sitting here all on my own,
Day dreaming into sky,
Wishing that was me up there,
I am wanting to die,
People think they know me,
but i hide the real me,
One day you'll soon realise and then you'll see,
I'm secretly falling apart
I block all of the pain whats in my heart,
feeling very numb,
I need to cry but i cant,
Some days i wish i wasn't here,
sometimes i wish i had a future but thats my biggest fear
Strong voices are in my head,
Shouting louder and louder each day,
I pray everyday that they'll soon go away,
They get stronger and stronger everyday,
so strongly feel people will be better off without me,
I just want to be happy and to be free,
No-one can see the pain behind my eyes,
no1 seems to really care
my heart is aching
And i cant stop shaking,
All im doing is falling apart
Dreading every single day ,
whats the point in living,
when i just want the days to go away,
Pushing the world away more and more each day,
I'm not gonna lie,
I cant keep my head held high,
Behind my smile is hurt and pain,
Just wishing i can cut at my vein,
Strong voices are in my head,
Shouting louder and louder each day,
I pray everyday that they'll soon go away,
They get stronger and stronger everyday,
so strongly feel people will be better off without me,
I just want to be happy and to be free,
Tears are running down my face,
I quit life, i really do,
I want to dissapear,
and never reappear,
I wish people would see what is true,
But im struggling and no-one has a clue,
I Really wish instead of cutting,
I could do a lot more harm,
But instead i keep on cutting at my arm,
Strong voices are in my head,
Shouting louder and louder each day,
I pray everyday that they'll soon go away,
They get stronger and stronger everyday,
so strongly feel people will be better off without me,
I just want to be happy and to be free,
Suicide Suicide deep in my head,
Really wishing that i was already dead,
So sick of cutting at my wrists,
I'm so done with this,
I'm praying but can you hear,
what i am saying,
I no longer want to live,
Ive got nothing to give,
So sick of smiling when
inside i cant stop crying,
All i ever seem to do is try,
But its never good enough,
Cos im still hear fighting and wanting to die,
Only friend i can turn to is my blade,
Hoping one day soon it'll soon fade,
but im so scared i cant give it up,
I'm so very afraid,
Hiding behind my smile,
Is a broken heart,
and me secretly falling apart.
30th January 2011
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